Deux Ex Machina

School starts tomorrow...

You know? The shitty thing about life is that there's no such thing as a Deux Ex Machina. We can't just suddenly have someone save our asses or solve our problems, like what happens in movies and stories.

And that sucks. Hard.

I mean, it would be cool to suddenly have a comet slam into a car that's about to run you over followed by ten donkeys playing banjos, then the car explodes, but amazingly, no one dies because...Because they were all temporarily phased to another dimension because an Alien Weapon was misfired in deep space. And after that you walk away as if nothing's happened.

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Yeeeeeaaaaah. Why can't stuff like that happen in real life!? WHY!? WHHHHYYYYY!?

Subconscious: *Ahem*

You! I thought I got rid of you!

Subconscious: Aha! You thought you got rid of me but I got away because of a conveniently placed 'Release Subconscious' button!

No!

Subconscious: Yes!

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Curse you, Deux Ex Machina!

Subconscious: But you wished it would happen in real life!

Fine. I hate it and want it.

Subconscious: You just contradicted yourself. Freak. And you're talking to your own subconscious. Freakier.

Ego: Yeah!

Shut up, ego. You're not important, and everyone thinks you're wrong.

Ego: Says you. Hey, I brought Logic along too.

...Fine. You can stay.

Subconscious: NOOOOO!!!! NOT LOGIC!

Logic: I didn't even say anything yet!

You just did. Man, you suck.

Logic: Logic dictates-

Shut up. You suck, because I say so. You're part of my psyche, ipso facto, what I say, goes. Do you comply?

Logic: Communist.

You want communist? Look for Soviet Russia. Even though it ended like ten years ago. Look for North Korea.

Logic: ...Fascist?

Nazi Germany.

Logic: ...I surrender.

Ego: What about me!?

You egotistical bastard, where were you when I needed you like 3 fucking years ago!?

Ego: Hey, I was on vacation.

Three years!?

Ego: I need a long break, what can I say?

Subconscious: ...This is getting weirder by the second. And I still hate you, Logic.

Logic: And I hate you too.

Play nice...
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On second thought, go ahead and kill subconscious, Logic.

Subconscious: Oh, you think you can kill me but-

Deux Ex Machina strikes again. Curses!

Subconscious: -I'm not tangible!

Logic: Neither am I!

THEN GO AHEAD A BITCHSLAP EACH OTHER! Sheesh. You guys are morons. Thank god my brain doesn't have your work ethics.

Brain: Uh...

Oh no.

Oh fuck no.

Brain: Hey, I blame ego. *Runs*

FFS. This sucks.

<~{K]->